Broken Past
by No Names McGee
Summary: The lone survivor of a Volturi southern raid, Bella’s been alone since 1936. As she wanders the world, she runs into the Cullens, a family of vampires that is nothing like what she’s known. Can they help her forget her bloody past?
1. Prologue

The lone survivor of a Volturi southern raid, Bella's been alone since 1936. As she wanders the world, she runs into the Cullens, a family of vampires that is nothing like what she's known. Can they help her forget her bloody past?

Disclaimer: I do not own these charcters and I don't own Mrs. Meyer's work. go figure.

Prologue 

I sat in the mansion's cellar with the other newborns, trying to clear my head of the night's events. Only six of us had made it through the last battle with our Master's enemies, and I didn't know how I would make it through the next. The screams of my fallen comrades still rang through my head, and I cringed. How did I go from Isabella Swan, the city chief's daughter, to a bloodsucking soldier in another world?

"You bastard." Marcella launched herself at Timothy, who had just muttered something about her to another newborn I couldn't remember the name of. I watched as they tried to rip each other apart, their uncontrollable strength and anger making a mess of our little hideaway. I would have stopped them like usual, but I knew it was no use. One of them would kill the other or someone else would step in and try to make them cool it. Either way, I couldn't care. We were all going to die anyway.

Over the roar of Tim as he yanked at Marcella's hair, I heard something upstairs. Someone screamed, and them I heard a sudden bang. The door to the cellar was flung open, and something rolled down the stairs. It was Master's head, eyes open in fear and mouth twisted in a grimace of horror and pain.

"Volturi" it rasped, before the eyelids fluttered shut. We looked at each other in confusion. Volturi? A figure stepped in the doorway, light haloing its cloaked form. Before anyone could move, it was down among us, pulling Marcella and Timothy up and systematically ripping them apart. Anther person came down, much slower than the first, and I saw the others shrink to the ground in pain.

I reacted in the best way I knew how: I hid, crawling to the next room and balling up inside an open cabinet. No one noticed my cowardly exit through all the confusion.

They had finished with the two brawlers, and now were moving on to the others. I could hear one of the intruders laugh, the laugh of a fallen angel, as she tore into another vampire. They screamed for mercy, and still they slaughtered them, ripping and tearing at the cowering bodies. Even though I couldn't see it, I heard. Somehow, I remained silent.

"Is that all of them, Demitri? Five seems quite small for the amount of trouble Aro made them out to be." The angel's voice said. It was demented, to hear something so sweet speak of something so macabre.

"I believe so, Jane. They apparently lost the majority of their force to the Fredric Coven last night. Still, I could have sworn Micah said he had 6 down hear." I could hear the one of them walk around, a sort of half-hearted attempt to find they escapee. To find me. I stopped breathing.

"Well, I guess they must have killed it or something. I really don't care. You know how these little beasts fight among themselves." The man, Demitri, said, giving up. Let's just torch the place and go home."

I heard the strike of a match, and them I smelt the bodies burning. The vampires flew back upstairs, leaving me alone in my cabinet as the only family I ever knew smoked away just one room over.

I just hoped maybe the flames would find me.

**I haven't seen anything like this, so I went ahead and took a crack at it. Let me know if its good and I'll post more.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight series or anything in them.**

Chapter 1 

I flipped the map in my hands, my eyes scrunched in concentration. After living on the run for over 70 years, one might think map reading would come easy to me. Guess not.

I still had a few miles to go to reach my destination: a tiny town by the name of Forks. It was nice and small, one of those places where everyone felt like family. It would be easier to control the monster with that knowledge. I hoped.

I stashed the map in my pack again and started running, turning a little east. I would try hunting before I went into town; maybe find a small lake and wash up, too. I had been trying to stay on an animal-only diet for the past few years since I had found out they could sustain me. I had been doing pretty well, too. I wasn't about to slip up now.

A scent drifted past my nose, and I adjusted my path some more. It was something large, maybe a big cat, or a bear. I sniffed the air again. Yes, definitely bear. I slowed when I knew I was close and pulled my pack and hoodie off, not wanting to get either messed up. My feet were silent as I crept up on the animal, my body crouched in attack position. It came into sight, and my body tensed. The giant brown animal had lifted its head from the small lake it was drinking from and began to back up, sensing danger.

Before it could get far I pounced, hands slamming into the head, snapping its neck back into a clean break. My fingers ripped away fur and skin so my teeth could sink into its jugular easier. All my other senses left me as I pulled the still warm blood from the creature, eyes closed it ecstasy. When there was nothing left but a shriveled body, I stood, feeling the hot blood of the bear spread throughout my body. A small sigh of comfort escaped my lips.

My thirst slated, I dragged the carcass away from the water and ran back to my pack, pulling out a nifty little foldable shovel. I dug the dead bear's grave in minutes and buried it, then headed back to the water.

My shirt and jeans weren't _covered _in gore, but there was obvious evidence of my meal left. I stripped down and jumped in the water, spending the next hour cleaning myself and my things. When I got back out, I threw the wet clothes over a low branch and put on my extra pair of blue jeans and a black cammi. I wasn't in a hurry, so I could wait for the clothes to dry before I started off again.

Digging through my bag, I found my compact mirror and a brush, wanting to make sure my hair was somewhat in control and my teeth were clean. I looked at my reflection. Dark brown hair framed a pale face with ocher eyes and full lips. I had the figure and features of someone young, and at to humans I was obviously between 16 and 19 years old. I checked my teeth and brushed out my hair, letting it fall in damp curls over my shoulders. Satisfied with my appearance, I smiled. Even as a vampire I was still plain, but it suited me just fine.

I remembered my first month as a vampire, as Master taught me of our ways and we tried to figure out my power. It wasn't until his lover, a little vixen named Chastity, tried to make me think I wanted to leave with her own power that we discovered I was impervious to our kind's mind tricks. It wasn't till the Volturi came that I realized the rest of my power, the reason they never found me. When I needed to, I could make it where I was entirely unnoticeable. Everything about me, from my scent to my appearance, would become so nondescript that even if I stood right in front of you, you would just look right past me, forget I was there. I could walk among humans in the sun, and they wouldn't notice. Steal from a store and no one would care. I was the wallflower in her full element when I wanted to be. It was the only thing that had kept me alive all this time, and had kept me alive my last night as a warrior newborn.

The memory snuck up on me, and I seemed to relive it. I could still remember that night, and their screams. I could hear the angel's voice laugh merrily as it tore into the closest things I had to friends and light their remains on fire. I remembered waiting for the fire to reach me, but it never did. And I remembered walking out into the ashes and embers, starving and half-crazy, but otherwise untouched. Most would call it a miracle, but I knew it for what it really was. Punishment.

I rubbed my temples, trying to clear my mind of the morbid memories. The sun was already sinking below the horizon, and I check the clothes, surprise to find they were already mostly dry. I packed everything back up, putting away the mirror and brush and folding the clothes neatly into my bag. A light breeze kicked up as I zipped it shut. I took a deep breath, expecting to smell the trees and water around me, and maybe a distant animal as it prepared for a cold night. Instead, I stopped all movement, my power instinctively kick in. I had smelt something totally foreign but faintly familiar, something that was just 3 or 4 miles ahead of me.

I had smelt other vampires.

Indecision gripped my mind, and I stayed motionless for what seemed like hours. I wanted to run away, to put as much distance between me and what lie upwind. My experience with those of my kind wasn't exactly pleasant, and I didn't want to expand on that. But another part, a stronger part, yearned to be near others like me, people that I could relate too. I had been alone for the majority of my life, and the thought of that changing made me stand up and walk swiftly toward the vampires.

I crouched behind a tree a couple yards away, watching. A blonde vampire, a male, was bent over a mountain lion, mouth at its neck. Suddenly a large burly man burst through the trees, a growl in his throat. When he saw the other vampire, and a look of shock crossed his face. Then he threw up his hands in exasperation.

"Damn it, Jasper! I've been tracking that one for miles and you have to go and kill it! Grah!" Something of a growl escaped his lips as he paced, thick muscles flexing as he clenched and unclenched his hands. The blonde vampire, Jasper, finished up with his meal and threw away the dead animal with a smile. "It's not my fault you're too slow. You know the deal, Emmet; first come, first serve." He chuckled, the smug smile still plastered on his face.

I held back a gasp as the big one launched himself at Jasper, and the two rolled on the ground in a vicious wrestling match. Emmett tried to use his strength to pin Jasper, but it seemed he was too quick. They continued this little battle until _another _vampire showed up. I had to grip the tree tightly to remind myself not to make a sound.

He was beautiful, I wouldn't doubt that. His boyishly handsome face was curved into a breathtaking smile as he watched the other two boys punch each other and fall back in pain. His hair was a windswept bronze, and I noticed for the first time he, like the other two, had golden eyes like mine. He let out a beautiful laugh, and I bit back a smile.

"Do you two always have to try kill each other every time we hunt? Let go of his hair, Jasper. He's right anyway, Emmet. That is the deal." The two boys stopped midfight, with Jasper's fingers locked in Emmett's hair, while Emmett had his hand locked around Jasper's throat. Both had their free hand raised, ready to punch. All three of them burst into laughter.

Jasper looked down at his ripped shirt with a grimace. "Alice is going to be mad I ruined another shirt. She's going to want to take us shopping." A look of mock horror crossed his face.

"Yeah. And your lucky Edward came. If you had messed up my hair Rose would've killed both of us." The scene was lighthearted and bright, and they all clapped each other on the back. They turned and began to walk away, still making quips about the fight and talking about the two girls. Before I even made the conscious decision, I began following them at a safe distance.

They began running, and I waited till they were far awy before I followed their scent. Any thought of going into town had left my mind now. I wanted to meet these boys, especially the bronze haired one. Something about them, maybe their eyes, or the way they were so carefree, made me very curious.

I followed their trail until I came to a large clearing. A huge house rose up before me, a three storey white Victorian. Its entire back wall had been replaced with glass, and I could see two of the boys, Edward and Emmett, playing a video game in what seemed to be the living room. A gorgeous blonde girl walked up and set her hand on Emmett's shoulder, and I saw he suddenly wasn't doing too well. His car on the TV veered off the virtual road when she whispered something in his ear, making Edward roll back in uncontrollable laughter.

Two other people, vampires, came into the room holding hands. They were also new. One was blonde and looked a little older than the rest, who looked like they were in their teens. The woman beside him had a motherly look about her, with a kind face and light auburn hair. They seemed to be a couple, and I could see a wedding band on both of their hands.

The blond one fro the woods was nowhere to be seen, and I looked up the other floors, momentarily forgetting my need to stay hidden as I searched. My eyes lit on a third floor room. A small pixie-like girl stood at the window, her eyes showing obvious confusion and something that looked like… excitement?

She was looking straight at me.

**Man, guys! I'm really happy I've gotten so many reviews in one day! This story is becoming a lot easier to write than my other one, so I hope to be updating often. Still, school might get in the way, so don't be surprised when I disappear for a few days. I'm sooooo happy for all those that reviewed or put me on their alert list. Both are awesome to me. The more you review, the more you guilt trip me into updating, so thanx. **

**Luv ya!**


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own the books, so put the gun down and we can have a nice cup of coffee and forget this eeevvveer happened…

Chapter 3

I paced on the outskirts of the woods, glancing occasionally at the house. After that incident with the pixie girl, the entire family (because that was the only was to describe them) had been aware of my presence. The older blonde male had tried to approach me, but I had run off. That was hours ago, and for some reason I was drawn back to the end of their yard, wearing a path down in the grass from my little laps. It was a dangerous game I was playing here, but something in me couldn't lose the sight of the 7 vampires.

I looked up to see the Edward boy pacing, too. He was looking out into the woods with a confused and somewhat angry expression on his face, and for some reason it made me smile. I mentally checked to make sure my cover was still intact, and then sat down, watching.

I had been there for hours already, but I had had my power up the entire time. Still, somehow the boy knew I was there, waiting from somewhere in his backyard. I couldn't figure why, but I enjoyed watching his frustration as he searched. Every now and then he would stop and cock his head, as if listening for me, and then resume his pacing, head shaking in denial.

One of the other newborns in my coven had once described the feeling my power gave, and I felt a little sorry for toying with Edward. '_It's like when you forget some small but vitally important detail, and you can't figure out where or what it is." _He'd said_. "Or how you'll search for a friend in a big crowd, and for one moment you think you see them, but it turns out to be this stranger from Lexington. Only you're not in a crowd, and you aint a friend.'_

I leaned back on my arms with a sigh, my mind still caught in the past. I could see with crystal clarity my Master's face, his chiseled features distorted with greed and death. He had forced me into my first battle after just a week as a vampire. 'Trial by fire', he had said. My fingers traced along the scars on my other arm, and I grimaced. I had survived his test, but barely.

I remembered all the nights in the cellar, everyone a stranger and a friend at the same time. We all had the same story: caught at night for some reason or another, forced to fight, then thrown down here until the next battle with an unknown enemy. We were joined in our morbid luck and impending deaths, and that was enough for us to either form strong bonds or vicious hatred to one another.

Pulled back to reality, I watched the older male come up and stand by Edward, and I could see they were talking, even if I couldn't hear. Edward would shake his head every now and then, motioning out towards my general direction. They seemed to argue for a moment, and Edward folded his arms into a stubborn stance. The other one just ran his fingers through his golden locks and said one last comment, then turned and went back the way he came.

Edward returned to his patrol, but now his feet moved faster and his face seemed to darken. After one final glance, he turned to the wall and slammed his fist right through the plaster. I gasped, and then fell back in uncontrollable fell back in laughter. Was he really so upset over me? I didn't know why I found it so comical. He was _so_ angry over such a small thing. It was the only way I could react to something so juvenile.

When I had regained my composure and looked back, I saw he was gone. I frowned. I wasn't left to wonder for too long though, because a figure emerged from around the house within a matter of seconds. I watched as Edward came to a stop in the middle of the yard and sat down, his face hidden in shadow.

He surprised me further when he began to speak.

"Look, I know you're out there. We don't want to hurt you; we just want to know who you are." His voice was quiet, and I almost didn't think he had spoken. It was like the smooth line of a seasoned actor, almost pleading in its sincerity. I felt my shield begin to falter.

He must have sensed it, looking over in my general direction. An incredulous look came over his face. "They think I'm crazy," he said, motioning to the house. I saw the rest of the family was gathered around in the main room, either looking at Edward in disbelief or looking for me. "Even Carlisle thinks you stayed away last time. But… I'm not sure, and I need to know.

" Please come out. I can't stand not knowing." He was defiantly pleading then, and I knew it was over. Mentally I kicked myself for caving to a complete stranger.

I watched as he registered my sudden appearance, from my wary face to my ragged clothes, and I watched his face go from shock to a grateful smile in record time. I was a bit taken aback at the beauty of that smile; it was as if I was the only person left on earth and he had just found out about my existence. I suddenly felt very self conscious, and I pulled my jacket arms down to cover my scars as I sat up.

"Hello."

He seemed to inch forward, and I noticed he smelt awfully good. I wanted to answer back, say 'hi' or 'howdy' or something in Spanish, but all I could muster up was a nod. He noted my discomfort and came to a stop five feet away, sitting on the dirt cross legged.

"My name is Edward Cullen, and those people," he turned and looked at the shocked vampires inside, "are my family. My father, Carlisle, had tried to meet you earlier today, but I believe he must have scared you. I apologize for that."

I glanced at him warily, and then looked up at his family. They all seemed shocked I was there, and stared at us in awe. The only one who didn't seem surprised was the pixie girl, because she just looked at me as if I was a long awaited guest who had finally decided to show up. She caught my glance and gave me an encouraging nod.

Edward noticed my looking and chuckled. "That's Alice. From what I gather, she's been expecting you. So have I." He looked at me pointedly. "I've known of your presence for some time, but I can't figure out why I couldn't find you until now." He paused as if expecting me to say something. When I didn't offer up anything, he continued. "We would like to speak with you about that, if you don't mind. My brother and I are what you might call 'scholars', and we would love to hear about your power and your travels. You could come inside, rest for a little, get cleaned up." He shifted, looking away. "But… but only if you want to."

Again, I was very surprised. I was expecting him to come and ask me to leave, or point me in the direction of some 'Waywardly Vampire Help Center', but my mind hadn't even registered the thought of him inviting me in. Inside, I struggled with common sense and my own sudden need to know this Edward person.

"Please?"

Damn. I didn't know why, but I couldn't stand denying him. I gave another curt nod and stood up, grabbing my pack. Edward rose much more fluidly and led me to the house, walking at a slow human pace to make sure I didn't dart in the other direction. When we reached the side door he must have come out of, he went to open it for me. I grabbed his arm before he touched the knob and tried not to notice the feeling of his skin on my own.

"My name is Bella."

**Right. This is how far I got with my other story, so let's hope school doesn't suck all the creativity from me like last time. I don't know, this one just seems better. I apologize if the characters seem a little OOC, but that was the best way I could put their first meeting. If you got any ideas or comments, CLICKY CLICKY DA BUTTON!**


	4. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: No me writo de book. La Senora Meyer writo de book.

Chapter 3

"My name is Bella."

He met my eyes, seemingly grateful to finally know something about me. I noticed he was much more breathtaking up close than I had earlier thought; he had the perfectly sculpted face one of a young god, his eyes a deep liquid gold. And his _scent_…

When Edward didn't move, I noticed my hand was still on his arm. I pulled back, embarrassed. _The first contact I have with one of my species in over 50 years, and I can't keep my hands off him. _I was suddenly thankful I couldn't blush anymore; I'd be red as a tomato.

He recovered first. "Well then, Bella. Allow me to show you in?" He had opened the door, and I followed him through what must have been a kitchen, though it had been converted into some mad designer's workplace, with blueprints and paint swatches and flower catalogues covering the counters. "Esme likes to renovate" was the only explanation Edward offered at my bewildered looks.

There was a doorway heading into the living room, and I expected for Edward to lead me that way. But instead he turned, walking into a sort of dining room, with a large wooded table, surrounded by chairs. And in those chairs were the Cullens.

I was a little startled, all of them looking at me as if wanting me to say something. The blonde man, Carlisle from what Edward said, rose out of his seat in welcome.

"Carlisle, I'd like you to meet Bella, the girl from the forest." He looked to me with amusement, as if this was more of a title than a description. "Bella, this is my family, Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rose." I gave a small smile in greeting, looking at each. Emmett grinned, bearing his teeth, and Carlisle, Esme and Jasper gave me warm smiles. Alice looked as if she was getting that Christmas present that had eluded her for months, and Rose looked both bored and annoyed at the same time. Awkward.

Edward took an empty seat by the still grinning Alice, and I stood there, looking at them. Not ten minutes ago I had been hiding in their bushes, and now I felt somewhat of an idiot. No one said anything, and I felt like I was in trouble. And then the words came gushing out as I tried to explain my freak-of-nature behavior.

"I'm sorry for spying on you but I saw you three hunting and talking and stuff and I was curious and when I saw your home and I guess Alice I was even more curious but I was kind afraid because you are vampires like me and I haven't met any for a long time and-"

I cut off quickly when Carlisle held up his hand with a grin. Instead, I concentrated on my breathing, which was close to hyperventilating. Even if I didn't need it, those were still the most words I had said in the past 50 year's **total, **and it made me mentally winded. I noticed Emmett was shaking, trying to cover what I guessed was laughter at my outburst. The rest were trying to hide their grins like Carlisle.

"That's ok, Bella," Esme said. "We aren't mad at you."

"Oh." I let out a relieved sigh, smiling gratefully at Esme. She returned the favor.

"Here Bella. Why don't you sit down?" Jasper slid a chair towards me, and I plopped down, suddenly calm and relaxed. I placed my bag by my feet and scooted closer to the table. I caught Edward shooting Jasper odd looks. They weren't the confused ones he gave me, but just surprise. I guessed it was because he was being nice to me.

"Actually, we were sort of wondering about your power, Bella. Just within our family, Alice, Edward and Jasper each are gifted, but we've never seen a power with quite the extent of yours." Carlisle said. "Could you explain how it works? It's not often someone sneaks up on Jasper, though both Alice and Edward knew you were around."

What can they do?" I asked before I could stop myself. Alice spoke up this time. "Me? I can see what may happen in the future. I saw you coming, and that's why I knew where to look earlier. Edward can very annoyingly read minds, and Jasper here is what you might call an emo-path, where he can feel and influence the emotions of others. And you?"

She didn't say it in a rude way, but I knew I would have blushed red for totally ignoring Carlisle's question. I looked at the wood grains of the table instead. "I can, uh, blend, I guess. When I want to, I can make everything about me seem commonplace, ignorable. Like a leaf on a tree or a face in a crowd. Just… blend, from my looks to my scent to my actions."

"Oh!" Edward seemed to have an epiphany from his seat in the corner. He chuckled, and I had to keep from almost hyperventilating again. "All day I have been hearing Jasper think, 'Emmett's content, Esme's feeling productive, everyone's happy. The trees seem more worried today, but I guess that's normal.' That's how I knew you were out there. Alice was having random visions of our backyard, too, so I had assumed you had come back." He had a smug smile as everyone absorbed this information, but then he asked the question I knew should been bugging him.

"But why can't I read your mind still? I thought maybe you still had a part of your power working when we came in, but Jasper can obviously feel your emotions and knows it's not the trees."

I saw Jasper shoot Edward a dirty look for the jab. "I really don't know. For some reason I was always immune to powers involving the mind." I sat, thinking. "The only explanation that I can give is that I was very reticent as a human. It must have just carried over and made sure it stayed that way, by shutting _everyone _out. I really don't know."

Edward accepted that, thinking, and the next question came from Emmett. "You aren't a people eater, are you? I mean, you have our eyes, but you never know. Are you a true vegetarian, or is this just a phase for you? It's kind of odd to see a lone vampire abstaining from humans." he smirked, and I knew he meant to embarrass me. He succeeded.

I rubbed the back of my neck, thinking of how I could explain it. "I… I didn't used to be. The family I came from, we weren't exactly human friendly. Actually, we were very bloody." I didn't want to say how bloody. I was ashamed of that part of my past more than anything. "And when we, uh, split up, I spent my life hunting less, but still with humans as prey. It wasn't until about 25 years ago that something in me changed. I was tired of all the death, all those screams…

"So basically I cut off cold turkey. For a while I was just staying away from everything with a heartbeat, starving myself, hating who I was. I didn't think of killing myself, just torturing that part of me. I think I lived like that for a year, until I decided I would just hunt animals like I did when I went so far north it wasn't worth killing people. I still hate it, but it's my only alternative."

The only part of that confession I didn't feel weird about was the look on Emmett's face. Dumb Struck. I sighed. "When you're alone for so long and all you hear is the death of those who sustain you, it's kind of hard not to."

They seemed to mule that over, and I took the moment to really study them. Carlisle and Esme were obviously an item, and the way Jasper looked protectively to Alice I knew they were, too. I remembered the way Rose had whispered in Emmett's ear during the video game, and I put them together too. It took me a second to realize Edward was the only single Cullen, but when I did my mind went over to the person beside me. The way he had come to me hen I was too afraid and the way he smiled made my silent heart squeeze and my insides squirm.

"Bella. _Bella." _I was pulled from mythoughts by the sound of my name, and I caught Edward looking at me in his frustrated/confused/contemplative way again. Quickly, so he wouldn't trap me with those eyes, I looked at Alice, who had spoken. "Bella, would you like to stay with us for a while? You don't have too, but if you're not going somewhere special…" she left the sentence hanging, giving me a look that pulled at my heartstrings.

I fumbled with my words. "I don't know. I don't want to impose, and I'm not the best of company anyway." My entire being was torn. I wanted to stay, to get to know these people, but I felt like I didn't belong. _You don't, _a part of me said. _You deserve only your company, as a coward and a killer. _I wanted to tell it no, that then was different. I was different. But that nasty little voice was strong, and I believed it.

"Please?" I met Edward's eyes, surprised that he was using that word again. The plea went straight to his eyes, and I crumbled like a cookie.

My reply was almost silent. "Ok."

**MILESTONE!!!! Not exactly for the story, but for me. 4****th**** chapter and still rollin', you guys! I think it was from all the review and alerts and favs and stuff. I get home from a hellish day at school to find 16 emails from FF about this story, and it had me grinning like an idiot.**

**I'm sorry for all the grammar errors from the last one. I went over it to get back on track and almost hung myself for all my mistakes. I can't remember who, but I now have a word Nazi. YOU ARE WELCOME HERE. Nothing makes me screw up faster than Big Head Syndrome, and it reminded me to check back over my work. You better the world, my friend**

**So, I want to do the next chapter in Edward's point of view. Is that cool? I bow to your rule, the reviewer's, so your wish is but my command. **

**Don't forget to CLICKY CLICKY DA REVIEW BUTTON**

**PLEZ?**


	5. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight series, ok? Never have, probably never will.

Chapter 4

EPOV

3 Days Later

My fingers tapped along to the song's bass beat, eyes closed. I was trying to lose myself in the music, drown out the voices that were abuzz in my head. So far, it wasn't working. It was one thing to shut out my family; another to shut out myself.

I was thinking about Bella. There was something about her, something that drew me in from the first look. I found myself thinking about her constantly, from the time she appeared on the fringes of the forest to the time she touched my arm to the time I last saw her, walking up to her room an hour ago. She had smiled at me.

Her smile was so beautiful. _She _was so beautiful. From her shadowed eyes to her stubborn chin to her dark locks of hair, she was an angel. It seemed odd to me that her ability was to blend in. She was too amazing to blend.

The family, with the exception of Rosalie, of course, had absorbed in her easily. They were comfortable with her almost-always silent presence, and when they did converse with her, they found she had a light humor and kind disposition.

But for some reason, and I could never figure out why, she seemed to avoid me.

I was nothing but kind, as polite as I could be whenever I was near her. But whenever the family invited her to go somewhere or do something she would ask if I was involved. If I was, she would suddenly back out, saying she didn't want to go or had something she had to do. She wouldn't sit by me or be in the same room as me for long, and she rarely spoke to me.

And it wasn't as if I could just pick her brain and find out why. Her mind was as silent to me as she was.

_Edward._

_Edward._

_Edward Mason Cullen._

I could hear Alice mentally calling my name, and I turned down my music so she would know I was listening.

_Will you stop brooding? You're making Jasper all moody._

I thought of going downstairs to the living room and telling Alice that I didn't give a damn, my feelings were my feelings. Alice growled aloud. I saw the vision play through her head, and for a second thought I might actually follow up on it.

_Fine. Stay depressed. But Bella isn't going to spill her guts to a guy who's locked in his room playing music so loud it'll make __**us**__ go deaf._

Again, I thought about going downstairs, but this time asking her for any ideas.

_Invite her on a hunting trip. Jasper and I will come too. Even if we just hunted, he gets hungry quicker and you've been stressed so much you're eyes are black._

I shook my head, turning the music back up. She would never come, especially if I asked. And anyway; Bella said she had hunted just before she saw us that first day. She had no reason to go.

_She will say yes if you ask her. Just go._

I couldn't tell if Alice was lying or not, because her and Jasper had focused their minds on putting on hunting clothes. I groaned, running my hand across my face. Today was not the day for rejection.

I found myself walking to Bella's room on the second floor, anyway. Alice and Esme had cleared out one of the unused offices for her the night she agreed to stick around, and Bella had settled right in. She had said it was one of the nicest things anyone's ever done for her, even though all they did was swap out the desk and chair for a dresser, couch and stereo.

I raised my had to knock on the door, but a soft 'come in' came from inside the room before I could. I made sure my shirt wasn't messy from lying on the couch, and then I grasped the knob. Here goes nothing, I thought, pushing the door open slowly.

She was seated on the couch which she had turned facing the glass wall, a small notebook resting on her knees as she sketched something in it. A soft smile was playing along her lips, and her hair was pulled up in a sloppy ponytail that made her look cute.

When she looked up to see who it was, her eyes widened in shock and she snapped her book shut. She seemed to fumble with it as she stuffed it in her pack, almost ripping the zipper in her haste. Then she stood up and spun around to face me, the panic slowly receding from her eyes.

Great.

I'm sorry if I was interrupting something," I said, backing up. "I can come back later. It wasn't that important." As I turned to go, I saw a new panic rise.

"No! I mean, no, its fine. I was just, uh, drawing the forest, is all. I'm a little shy about my artistic ability." I could tell she was lying, but I let it go. If she didn't want to tell me, I would have to live with it. She plucked at her long sleeve, suddenly shy. "Did you need something?" her eyes cast down to look at her sock clad feet.

"Not at the moment. But I will ring when I require you're assistance." I said, trying to lighten the mood. It worked. A small smile shone on her lips. I dug my hands in my pockets. "Actually, Bella, I was wondering if you would like to go hunting with Alice, Jasper and me."

I saw the answer in her already, the way she seemed to shrink back and her head shook slightly before she even looked up at me. It made my stomach drop, and I wanted nothing more to run from the room and forget I ever asked. She opened her mouth to say it, to say the dreadful 'no' that would send me back to my room.

I spoke before she could, suddenly desperate. "I would really love it for you to come." I looked her straight in the eye, begging mentally for her to say yes. I didn't know why I was so determined, but I was tired of staying away. I wanted to know Bella.

A resigned look came over her face, followed by a glint of frustration that was covered with her heart-awakening smile.

"You know what? Sure. Just let me get ready and I'll be down in a few."

XOXOXOXOXOXO 

I darted through the woods, taking point as the other three fell in behind me. There was something about running, something about feeling the wind in my hair that set my mood on fire and my worries away in the wind. My biggest irritation now was just Alice and her big ego.

_I _told _you. All you had to do was ask, and you see? An entire day to get to know each other._

It would take weeks to shrink her head back down to a safe size.

We ran for about 45 minutes, coming to a stop in a clearing somewhere in the Spokane National Park. I checked my watch and we all agreed to meet back in 5 hours. Just before we split up, I heard Jasper think,

_Don't worry. Even if she doesn't show it, she likes you. _

She likes me? What? For the first time in a long time, I didn't understand. She _likes _me? How? I mean, was she attracted to me or did she just want to be friends? Did she think I was funny or did she like the way I looked?

Jasper chuckled at my confusion and ran after Alice, who had caught the trail of a herd of deer. Bella was also gone, and I was left, dumbstruck in the middle of the forest with rain beginning to fall.

What was wrong with me?

For all my life I had never cared about what any female thought of me, good or bad. I wasn't really interested, in all truth. But now this mysterious creature shows up in our backyard and I'm going haywire over if she even likes me? I needed to talk to Carlisle. Maybe I was sick.

After I had recovered from my little moment, I set out on my own hunt. Because of the rain, everything was harder to find, tracks either washed away or scents diluted. I did manage to find a large male moose, but besides a few squirrels nothing else was out. **(And no, he didn't eat the squirrels)**

Suddenly I heard a ripping growl to the west of me, and I darted off to find the source. When it came into view, I stopped dead in my tracks. Bella was hunting.

It was something so amazing to watch, and yet so chilling. Sweet Bella, quiet, fragile little Bella, was crouched into attack position, the sleeves of her jacket pushed up and her eyes lit on her prey: a huge mountain lion. I watched as she deliberately stepped closer to the bristling predator, as she growled in response to its hiss.

And then it happened. I saw her foot dig into the mud, her body's slight recoil. One moment she stood before it, and the next she was rolling with the great cat, the force of her leap bringing them both down. In a matter of seconds she was crouched above it, razor teeth sunk into the animal's mangled neck.

She suddenly froze, turning slowly. A small squeak came from her when she saw me, and she dove behind a tree.

I walked up to the tree slowly, sitting with my back against the bark on the other side. I began humming a song that had been going through my head since the day before. I would need to write it down when I got home; Esme would like it.

I felt something brush against my arm, and I looked over to see Bella sitting next to me. She was gazing at something in the distance, her sleeves back down and the blood and dirt wiped clean from her face. I rested my head against the tree, returning to my melody.

"I'm sorry I keep doing that. You always seem to catch me off guard, is all." I looked over to find her staring at her hands. Her face was pulled into a frown.

"Doing what?" I asked.

"Jumping and running whenever I see you."

"Oh." I said. I waved my hand in dismissal. "People do that all the time. It's no big deal. I constantly scare away pretty girls and grown men alike. It's sorta my thing." I gave her a 'duh' look to emphasize my point.

She laughed, and it sounded like church bells to a weary saint. She looked back up, seriousness returning to her eyes.. "No, really. And I'm sorry for avoiding you, too. It's not fair for you. You're actually a really nice guy."

"Why then?"

"Why then what?" She asked, cocking her head in confusion.

"_Why are you avoiding me_?" I asked, looking at her pointedly.

She flicked some mud off her jeans, thinking. "I don't know. There's something about you-"

"There's something about me?" I asked, cutting her off. "What, do I look like Dracula or something?"

"No, no, silly." She said, shoving me a little. "It's just… and I can't believe I'm about to say this, but it's just that I haven't been around any other vampires for a very long time and you confuse me. A lot."

I thought about that, looking out to the trees. I confused her. I guess that was fair. She confused me, too. From the way she walked, like she had thought every step through, to the way she smiled, like it held the secret to true joy, to the way she plucked at her sleeve when she was nervous, as if it held all the answers. Every action confused me and enthralled me in equal measure.

"How old are you, Bella?" I asked suddenly.

"Do you mean years wise or looks wise?"

"I guess both, if it's ok."

She gave me a mock-superior look, sitting up straight. "I am 17 years old, and celebrated my 72nd vampire birthday September 13th."

I smiled. "Sorry. I'm 17 too, but I got you beat by about 30 years."

She muttered something under her breath. It sounded like 'old fart', but I couldn't be sure.

I looked at my watch, standing up. With a mock bow, I extended my hand to Bella. "My lady, I believe it is time to return to the party. Allow me to escort you?" She set her little hand in mine and I pulled her up as gently as possible. Still she somehow managed to stumble, falling into my chest. I got the feeling she would have blushed red if she could have.

"Whatever will the neighbors think, dear Edward?" She said, trying to laugh it off as she righted herself. She let go of my hand and began walking in the direction of the clearing, humming my song.

I didn't care what the nonexistent neighbors thought. All_ I_ could think of was the feeling of Bella's body against my own.

**Shizam. I am sorry it's a little late. Friday became a sort of 'Girls Night Out Plus Tyler' thing, so I was dead when I got back home, and then slept in super late. And on top of that I couldn't find music that put me in the right EPOV kinda mood, until I put all my classical piano music on. So yeah. Excuses. **

**I'm sorry if the characters seem a little OC. I'm in too good of a mood to go all seriously edwardy on ya'll today. But, if you have some suggestions on how you think Edward SHOULD act, tell me.**

**Luvs, jess**


	6. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: See the chapter before.

Chapter 5 

Edward Cullen was the most confusing creature on the face of this Earth. I could not understand him AT ALL. Not only did he seem to catch me at all the wrong times, but he also seemed to have the power of persuasion over me.

And he was amazingly gorgeous.

Ever since I had joined the Cullen clan he had been the presiding force in my mind. Every time I closed my eyes I saw that crooked smile and bronze head of hair. His voice destroyed my equilibrium and his touch sent electric shocks throughout my entire body. It was amazing and terrifying at the same time.

I wasn't sure if I liked that feeling. I wasn't sure at all.

I had thought that if I just steered clear of him then he would do he same to me, and I wouldn't have to worry about dealing with my loss of willpower around him. And loss of coordination. And concentration. But after today, I had found it was a futile attempt. I was completely smitten by him.

We had returned from hunting about an hour ago. I remembered tripping as he helped me up, then falling into his chest. I still seemed to tingle where we had touched, still felt giddy at the thought. I couldn't stand how this guy had power over me; how just his smile sent my stomach flipping and his eyes scorched away my ability to think straight. It wasn't fair.

I was Isabella Swan, for Christ's sake, the only one to ever survive a Volturi scourge! I had traveled the world undetected, stood on my own two feet for the better part of a century. Yet I couldn't tell the devilishly handsome Edward Cullen 'No' to his face.

I was asking for trouble.

I stomped up the stairs, my anger beginning to surface. This shouldn't happen, I told myself. I'm not that kind of person. I was not supposed to have feelings for Edward. I wasn't here forever, anyway.

As I was walking to my room, I saw Jasper's head pop out of the library, a confused look on his face.

"Angry?" he asked.

I sighed, hand on my doorknob. "Yeah, but not at anyone particular." There was no sense in saying I wasn't. Jasper _knew._ He motioned for me to join him then disappeared back into the room.

I walked into the library, plopping down in a cushy chair. Jasper was on top of a very tall ladder, replacing a thick book on the top shelf. The entire room was lined, floor to ceiling, with books. I couldn't tell if it was Jasper or my natural comfort with novels, but the room suddenly felt much cozier.

Jasper leapt down and sat back in the chair across from me. He smiled, obviously finding something funny. I glared at him.

Jasper leaned back casually, inspecting his fingernails. "You know, Bella, whenever you and Edward spend time together, I get the weirdest emotions." He cleaned dirt from under his pinky nail.

I froze, and I could feel my face paling. I was right. Jasper _did_ know.

"You see," he continued, still fascinated with his fingers, "I start feeling a wave of uncomfortable anxiety, and something of bittersweet joy. That's before you feel the need to jump him, and then, suddenly, you give the oddest show of anger." He looked up, humor obvious on his face as he motioned towards me.

I knew I would have blushed red as a beet if it was possible. I stood up, a new fury running through my veins. "If you just called me in here to pick on my emotions, then I am leaving." My hands balled up into fists when Jasper started laughing.

"Cool it, Bella. You're quite quick-tempered, aren't you?"

I growled. Jasper shook his head and sighed. "Please just sit back down. I was only playing."

I stood there for a moment, debating on what to do. In the end I sat back down with a huff. Jasper smiled apologetically.

"I didn't mean to upset you. Well, scratch that. I kind of did." He chuckled. Then his face grew serious when he saw my expression. "No, I'm sorry Bella. That was mean." I rubbed my temples, suddenly feeling very forgiving. Why did he have to have that power?

"Then why did you say it? He can probably hear us, you know." I almost went crazy as I thought that. Edward, knowing how I feel whenever he is around me… I would kill myself.

Jasper shook his head. "Nah. Edward ran off to his meadow after your little chat."

"Good." I said, mildly relieved. So I wouldn't have to kill myself. That was nice.

Jasper sat forward, his voice dropping. "Bella, it's ok if you have feelings for my brother."

I looked down, suddenly shy. "No it isn't." My voice was as soft as his, but I was sure he could hear the choked sorrow within.

"Why not?"

I plucked at my sleeve again, nervous. How could I tell him without revealing my secret? I put the words together like a small puzzle, wringing my hands as I spoke.

"Because… because I'm trouble. I_ am_ a proven danger magnet. Because I'm a killer and a coward and he deserves much better. And because _I can't fall for him_. I don't plan on being here forever, and the only thing I will do is hurt him." He grew quiet at my confession, then he sighed.

"You know, you sound just like him." He said, shaking his head. He saw my confused expression, but said no more about it.

Jasper suddenly changed the subject, his face thoughtful. "You know Alice was in an asylum most of her human life?" He saw my shock, but continued talking anyway. "And Esme tried to commit suicide. Me? I'm a war veteran." His face clouded. "In more ways than one. I have more shadows following me than you would know."

"Rose had killed in revenge before, Emmett was a heavy drinker as a human, and Edward went renegade for about ten years or so. Carlisle, well, the only thing I can think of Carlisle is that he was a freak of nature that went against the norm." He met my eyes. "We all have our pasts, some better than others. But we all deserve each other. And so do you."

I rubbed a small scar on my left palm. I could tell Jasper everything, from how I killed and I ran and how I watched them burn. I could tell him about it all, show him the scars. I knew he would understand more than anyone. But I couldn't. I didn't want that here, in this house, around these people. It didn't belong.

I didn't know Jasper had risen until I felt his hand on my shoulder. He looked down at me, a small smile on his lips. "I don't know what happened to you. It was obviously very bad, and I hope someday you can trust us enough to tell. But no matter what you think, you are a good person, Bella. Don't ever doubt that."

I shook my head, unwilling to believe. He only said that because he didn't know the whole truth, the voice inside said. He didn't know me.

Jasper sighed and began walking toward the door. But before he left, he turned, looking at the carpet.

"My brother's been alone for his entire life, Bella. Somehow, I think you can change that."

And then he left, leaving me with much more than what I had come with.

**Hmmnnn. I know a lot of you want her to 'open up' to Jasper, but no. I love him, but that is as much as he's gonna learn first hand. I need it to be Edward to find out about her secret. I don't know why, but i just do.**

**Now the next chapter is going to be the first part of our protagonist's epiphany, and I want to know: meadow or baseball? They'll have the same sorta outcome, just different circumstances.**

**Review!! I've got more alerts than I do reviews! Let's change this trend, please. (I know, I'm getting spoiled. But hey, it's all in your best interest. )**


	7. Author's Note

**Hey, this is an author's note.**

**Yeah, I know. Me too.**

**I'm really sorry for putting one, but I'm gonna be taking a break for a while. Not for like a month or anything, but probably till next week. I've got a lot of stuff coming up and I need to put then on my priority list, and I'm sorry to say this is way at the bottom.**

**Also, when I do get a chance to write, I want to spend more time looking over them and then digging deeper into the plot. I don't want to post a chapter and then regret it because I forgot a piece of information or put something that's gonna throw my entire plot outa wack. Trust me, it'll be worth it.**

**And last but not least, I want to thank all my Nazis and advisors for the feedback. I'm soooo glad that I now have something to improve on. All those 'update soons' and 'I FRIGGIN LOVE IT' do wonders for my ego, but nothing for my writing. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying that sometimes constructive criticism is good.**

**And as for my characters: I'm really glad you guys think Bella suits this story. I'm also you guys think Edward's OC. It confirms my suspicions. I will try to make him a little more in-character, but lately I just don't feel like dealing with PMSsy Boy. That is another thing I hope will get better after this little intermission, though I doubt he's going to change full circle. Because if you think about it, he's not killing himself for being able to kill his lovah. He's gonna be Edward, just not Edward with a death wish.**

**So no, I am not abandoning you all, just taking a vacation. And as for the next chapter, it is BASEBALLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm happy, too, because I am better at casual scenes than sentimental ones (see last chapter).**

**Luv ya!!**


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